Showing posts with label June 16. Show all posts
Showing posts with label June 16. Show all posts

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Blonde Two Coats and Blonde Bar

Blonde Joke Day!!! I would love for y'all to TRY to out joke me! Go on... I dare ya! Who's got the most original, rarely heard blonde joke? You got what it takes? Who's up for a blonde joke war? ANY takers?

Married blonde was concerned about her stupidity lately to her husband, so she decided to make it up to him by painting the house while he's away at work. The husband comes home, and the house was suspiciously green and smelled like paint, so he found his wife in the master bedroom and asked "What's going on". His wife still painting away but wearing a ski jacket over a leather coat. He said "What are you doing to the house, and why are you painting in a ski jacket and a leather coat? Blonde wife responds "The instructions on the can said ˜FOR BEST RESULTS, USE TWO COATS!
Wow... Amelia Bedilia moment thar...

A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?" In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something." Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?" The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."



TV show quote

Today's quote is from Star Trek! Go figure?!

“The Vulcan Neck Pinch is not half as powerful as the Vulcan Groin Kick, but it's more politically correct”

Haha! I just figured out how to remove a hyper link... take me long enough or what? Oh wells, now I know and I'm proud of myself xD xD xD

Quotes of the Day

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.
Jerry Seinfeld

A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.
Bill Crosby

I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show host.
David Letterman
(Ha! I just found my chosen profession!)

Song of the Day

Grow Old With You by Adam Sandler
This song is by Adam Sandler and is from the movie The Wedding Singer. I found it sweet and funny. You'd have to watch the movie to get a real laugh out of it and understand the joke behind it. I hope you enjoy this song! I have it memorized!!! Rofl xD
-Thing 1 <3

Lyrics:
I wanna make you smile whenever you're sad. Carry you around when your arthritis is bad. Oh, all I wanna do is grow old with you.
I'll get your medicine when your tummy aches. Build you a fire if the furnace breaks. Oh, It could be so nice to grow old with you.
I'll miss you, kiss you. Give you my coat when you are cold. Need you, feed you. Even let you hold the remote control. So let me do the dishes in the kitchen sink. Put you to bed when you've had too much to drink. Oh, I could be the man who grows old with you.
I wanna grow old with you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7CYI5bKZMes Grow Old With You by Adam Sandler

Thank you!

RandomThinker1, RandomThinker3, and I want to say thank you to all of our followers!

Comment below on what you like about our blog!

A Biology Lesson

Have you ever wondered why we have more black and white animals in the world over the other colors. Well it turns out these traits are dominant and not recessive.

Weird Huh?

You Better Not Put This on YouTube

HAHA

Saturday Night Live

Saturday Night Live has MANY great skits!!! Hilarious material! Here are a few of my favorites.



Hyper-Hypo:



The French Chef:

I hope you enjoy these clips... SAVE THE LIVER!!!

Rather odd creature.

Who told you that only plants can photosynthesize?

There is a sea slug found off the North American coast. It looks like a leaf and can produce food out of sunlight just like a plant.





Comment below and tell me what you think!

Riddle of the Day - June 16, 2011

Here is the riddle for today. No cheating! Play fair! Comment and take a guess at it below! Have fun!

"What can run but never walks, has a mouth but never talks, has a head but never weeps, has a bed but never sleeps?"

Quotes of the Day

Fixing a broken heart is easy but keeping it together is whats hard.

Love is like a needle.
You dont feel it enter, but you know its there.
You feel the pain and then it subsides.
You dont feel it leave, but its unbearable after.

Forgive and Forget. The best key to happiness. Well i may forgive you but i will never forget.

Attitudes are contagious. Are yours worth catching?

A fellow with the inventiveness of Albert Einstien, but with the attention span of Daffy Duck.
- Tom Shale on Robin Williams

I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
– Mark Twain


Chuck Norris Jokes- Round 2

Here's some more Chuck Jokes:

One time, Chuck Norris sued NBC for copyrights of his fists, Law and Order.

Chuck Norris has only one fear. It's to find out that there is no one left to roundhouse kick.

Chuck Norris can speak Brail.

Chuck Norris watched Twiligh... he's never stopped roundhouse kicking ever sense.

TV Show Quote

Today's quote comes from Seinfeld!

Cosmo Kramer: The bus is outta control. So I grab him by the collar, I take him out of the seat, I get behind the wheel, and now I'm driving the bus.
Jerry: Wow.
George Costanza: You're Batman.
Cosmo Kramer: Yeah, yeah, I am Batman. Then the mugger, he comes to and he starts choking me. So I'm fighting him off with one hand and I kept driving the bus with the other, ya know. Then I managed to open up the door and I kicked him out the door, ya know, with my foot, ya know, at the next stop.
Jerry: You kept making all the stops?
Cosmo Kramer: Well, people kept ringing the bell!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=otItiZq-S5I here's the video. The actual quote is toward the end


Song of the Day

Come Together by Aerosmith (I think the lyrics are hilarious and it's one of my favorite songs by them)

Lyrics:
Here come old flat top
He come groovin' up slowly
He got joo joo eyeball
He one holy roller
He got hair down to his knee
Got to be a joker he just do what he please

He wear no shoeshine
He got toe jam football
He got monkey finger
He shoot Coca Cola
He say I know you, you know me
One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Come together
Right now
Over me

He bag production
He got walrus gumboot
He got Ono sideboard
He one spinal cracker
He got feet down below his knee
Hold you in his arms yeah, you can feel his disease

Come together
Right now
Over me

He roller coaster
He got early warning
He got muddy water
He one mojo filter
He say one and one and one is three
Got to be good lookin' 'cause he's so hard to see

Come together
Right now
Over me

Come Together
Come Together
Come Together
Come Together
Come Together


I hope you enjoy! Does anyone have any song suggestions?